Finally Single

Soooooo...to be completely transparent, I want a man! I want to be pursued! I want somebody texting my phone and trying to come see me! I want to finally be in a relationship. I want to know what it's like! I honestly didn't even realize this! I THOUGHT I was content! I thought I didn't want a man! Why? Because I ALWAYS had one texting my phone and calling me and being my friend. I was being very disobedient because God BEEN done, yes, been done, told me that was bad for business.

What if my could be husband did try to talk to me but he seen I was constantly text Bob, Joe and Abram??? HOW can God send me a man when the spot is ALWAYS FILLED?!!! I was chanting "No randoms!!" because I wasn't dating anyone or sleeping with anyone, but I was USING my brothers in Christ to fill a void that only Christ can fill!

Smh.

So, here am I, brothers and sisters, letting you know for real for real, I'm tryna get a ring. Smh. Such a sad story.

I THOUGHT I was single, but in my heart I was not!

Upon this revelation of my heart, I immediately went to the Lord and prayed. I write prayers a lot, so I was writing it on my phone and I thought, man, this might help somebody! So, here it is, raw and real.

"I wanna be pursued!!! I want to have someone to text! I want a MAN on my team for once! Help me Jesus to give these desires to you and not let them consume me! Give me the patience to wait and the heart to want to please You more than wanting this. All in your way and in your timing, Lord. You are good and I know you have plans to prosper me and bring me that one of a kind love! And I know that if You want me, knowing me at my worst, that any man who doesn't want me is not for me. Help me to keep my worth ever before my eyes and to see myself through Your vision and not my own! Help me to see the ways in which you are pursuing my heart and showing me how it's done!!! Teach me to be submissive to Your Holy Spirit so that I will be a wife who knows how to be covered well. Show me what true love is so that when it comes to me I will recognize it and when the counterfeits come I will turn away! Help me to accomplish the dreams you have put in my heart during this season. I wanna court YOU Jesus! Remind me what romance is like and show me the truth of who I am. Love on me, Jesus, for you know best how I am to be loved. Lord, I devote my singleness to you. I don't want to want anything more than I want You. This is Your time to shape me, mold me, mend me, heal me, anoint me and exalt me. Make me who You want me to be. Rid me of my selfishness. Make me more loving, kind, and patient. In Your name I pray."

So, please, don't be like me and STOP acting like you don't want a man! You can say it all you want to your friends like I used to, but it won't change it! It's ok to want it, but it's never ok to want something more than you want God. Take that desire to Him and watch Him fulfill it! And if I call or text your phone talking bout some "I want a man like this" and blah blah blah, PLEASE tell me to shut up! Lol. WE have to STOP enabling each other, people!!! It's alright to know what you want and talk to one another about it; but when we singles are constantly talking about what we want in the next season, we will not enjoy this one!

So when your friend, male or female, comes talking to you about somebody, PLEASE, DON'T ENTERTAIN THEM!!! Now you KNOW that man or woman ain't for them, so WHY are you agreeing with everything they say and telling them to go for it??? Please, be helpers to one another and SHUT IT DOWN! REAL FRIENDS SAY NOOOOOO!!!

Point your friend to Jesus and the Bible and prayer! If God didn't speak that "advice" to you then do not share it. Unless the Lord parted the heavens and told you that's your homegirl's husband, do not giggle and help her pick apart everything he said to her. You might not be hurting her feelings, but you are playing a part in breaking her heart when that man walks into church with another woman! STOP being a PEOPLE PLEASER and be a GOD PLEASER. When you see your friend being crazy and planning her wedding to a man who has not even noticed her, please, love her by letting her know she is doing the most and she needs to focus on the Lord, give that to Him and let Him keep it until that man PURSUES her. (And I mean PURSUE with stated intentions, not saying hi or giving her a church hug. But that's a whole different blog.)

All that to say, praise God! I finally understand some more things now that I re-devoted my singleness to God. He truly is the best husband ever. Perfect even.

And now you know. Lol. I hope that this helped you and that it helps me! And if you need a listening ear, or you HAVE a listening ear please email me at ventura.ivory@gmail.com. Unless you're a man. Then don't email me at all. Email a brother, please. Lol.

Sincerely,
Your Finally Single Sister Ventura