How I Found Out How Much I Need Jesus EVERYDAY

Before I gave my like fully to Jesus it was everything in me to make it through some days in my own strength. Because I came to know Jesus at a young age, I always knew He was there for me. But I kind of treated Him like 911. When I just couldn't figure it out on my own, I would call Him in for emotional emergencies. Like when I was about to fail my second semester of freshman English. Or when I found myself in the midst of a sorority that I couldn't sort my way through or when life just became too much to handle in my teen years.

When I started walking with God legit everyday, it was a continual process to not do things on my own. That's just what I always did. Out of pride, fear, hurt I had a mentality that I had to do it all on my own because no one else would. And that God was there to help me when I couldn't do it anymore.

I truly believed that any sign of weakness was not okay. I was a leader. People would not follow me if I showed weakness in any form including, but not limited to, crying, failure of any kind, emotions of any kind whether they be happy or sad. I was assured that I had to be STRONG and being STRONG meant hiding and hoarding every emotion inside me. And once I was strong God could really use me.

I was wrong.

In my twenties, all three years of them, I'm learning that I need Jesus EVERYDAY. Not just in a crisis. And He is not burdened to be needed by me all the time! I had NO IDEA!!! I was trained not to need anyone ever. That's our parents' jobs, right? To teach us to be responsible self sufficient adults. But even my God-fearing mother left out depending on my heavenly Father. That God's grace and strength is made perfect in my weakness!!! Have you been allowing God's strength to be made perfect in your weakness? I have not. Because everyday I have refused to be weak even before Jesus. Hoping that the time I spent with Him yesterday or at church will sustain me. Or the scriptures that I know. Or my knowledge about God instead of God Himself.

I NEEEEEEEEEEEEDDDDDD JESUS because VENTURA is not about this sustaining new life thing on her own. I barely got by in my old life. In fact, I didn't get by. That's why I needed a new life cause I messed that one up so bad! Lol. Just saying. We all NEED the Lord more than we are willing to admit.

So I URGE you to EMBRACE your weaknesses EVERYDAY!!! Because when we are WEAK that is when Jesus is at His fullness in us.

YAY WEAKNESS!!!!